Happy Thursday! When I am feeling an overwhelming sense of anxiety I recognize that sometimes I just need to get some stuff out. The best way for me to do that is write, paint, draw endless lines and triangles. So here I am back to TouchTheSun, a few things I have been really thinking about. Social media and comment boards has become the new norm for faux dialogue. I'm human! I have thoughts feelings and opinions so here goes! Sharing my thoughts feelings and opinions not directly via social media. What have you been musing lately?
1. This weekend I talked to my dad and I wish that I could say he asked how I was doing or what was new in my life, considering I talk to him once in a blue moon. I now know more about his life and what is going on with him. I am still processing this, I think my feelings are hurt because I have expectations of what relationships should be like.
2. Black Lives Matter and Black on Black Crime are not synonymous. I have seen a lot of commentary on how Black Lives should matter all the time, not just in terms of police brutality, but also in terms of gang activity or black on black in black communities. I was thinking about this and it doesn't really make sense. I could be wrong because I do not actually have any facts to back up my claims but just consider this. I do not believe that folks who are in the trenches of gang life and criminal activity are out on the front lines of the Black Lives Matter Movement. But again I am in Cheney WA, I am not out here in these streets to know if that is true or not. I also think that Black Lives do matter all the time I am against police brutality in the same way I am against senseless crime in communities. Furthermore Black on Black Crime is a narrative created to show inferiority and take the focus off what really matters. It is very easy to try and look at all cases of black death and draw some type of comparison to further oppress and disenfranchise "races."
3. I am trying to learn how to meet people where they are in their experience and understanding. I can't come to a discussion ready to shut it down if one is not at the same level of understanding and experience.
4. A friend said something the other day. "You are not a garbage disposal." You don't have to ingest and take on what society says you are or should be. It's garbage. I really like that, it's a tough concept to swallow when somethings feel so inherently ingrained.
5. Have you ever heard of Eichmen in Jeruselam: A Report on the Banality of Evil by political theorist Hannah Ardent? I watched the movie and wow! This particular work had mixed responses but I believe that some of the themes she talks about apply to today on so many levels. Check it out one day!
6. I waited a few days to read about what was happening in Missouri. Yesterday I finally read the facts of what was going in. I applaud the courage of these students! As a black female who went to a predominantly white institution they demonstrated the feelings and thoughts that I did not have words for then. Just emotion, constant questioning if what someone did or said had to do with me being black. Because of the structure we've inherited it is a question that I ask myself more than I should have to. It is not a matter of sensitivity rather it is something so ingrained in fabric of America it is sometimes pervasive. I know I know I don't have to ingest it, why does everything have to be about... Well because the reality is, that sometimes it is about race, it is undeniable. I think the aftermath of Missouri illustrates that fact perfectly. It is one step these students took. I think in terms of changing structures we've got a long way to go. I still wonder what can I do to help change the system? Structures that marganilize and opress?
7. I do believe "We the People" have the power. We the people have to work together in solidarity against the structures and systems that prevail, not against one another. War Making 101: create a common enemy. If we each other are the enemy we stay blind to the reality of what is happening in the world around us.
8. Fall quarter is almost over and it is starting to get real. What am I doing next?
9. There will always be a fight for something. As long as humans and humans and self importance, capitalism, structures stand strong there will be a fight. I am not suggesting that we stop fighting or mobilizing, strides have been made. But humans are humans and self preservation is at the forefront of the human experience.
I think that's all for today. Very random but I've been thinking a lot. Share some of your thoughts.